5 Things You Never Want To Hear From Your Mum
Posted by Ling on November 22, 2011
My Mum and I have a pretty awesome relationship…especially now that we don’t live in the same country. It means that I don’t have to hear her nagging and she doesn’t have to hear me whining. On average, we speak about 2-3 times a month…I’m not the best talker on the phone or via Skype. I prefer face-to-face chats. If you know my Mum in real life, you’ll know she is one of a kind…she’s totally wacky!!!
Every time I call my Mum, she talks forever. On and on and on… She can talk for Britain, I tell you! Anyway, I called her yesterday because apparently, one of my brothers got a black rabbit…and I wanted to make sure that they had the rabbit checked for any diseases…
Instead, my Mum steered the conversation away…and somehow…I heard something that I NEVER EVER wanted to hear from my Mum…
Wait for it…
She gave me and the Mr – sexual advice!!!!! YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK!!!!
And the funny thing is, with her Chinese accent, she can’t say “sex” properly…and it comes out as “sezzz”….and EWWW EWWW EWWWW!!!
That’s enough now, Mother dear!!!!
So I thought I’d compile a list of 5 Things You Never Want To Hear From Your Mum (and I hope my Mum reads this list and never utters anything from this list!!!) :-
1. Any kind of sexual advice, e.g. “You guys shouldn’t have sex when…” – that was my Mum last night!!!! SICK!!!
2. ”I told you so!” - okay, we all know our Mothers are always right to some degree, but there’s no need to gloat and rub it in!
3. ”Tidy your room!” – not when you’re over 30 years old.
4. ”Make sure you do the housework and let your Husband rest!” – that is exactly what my Mum wrote on my Facebook wall for all to see!
5. The sexual activities which led to your conception, e.g. “That night, your Dad got really horny…” *lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala, I can’t hear you*
Anything else you never want to hear from your Mum? Leave a comment!
khatsii said,
omg. I HATE THOSE CONVERSATIONS! *shudder*
these are a few my mom does >_> *in heavy filo accent*
1. you don’t do that ‘thing’ with your boyfriend aye? you wait till you’re married!
2. *after cleaning the entire of downstairs, she comes home from being out all day* AIIIIIIII! YOU DIDN’T CLEAN?
3. why do you have to work? you have to clean the house!
[Reply]
Ling Reply:
November 22nd, 2011 at 4:36 pm
@khatsii, LOL…mothers eh?!!! Gotta love ‘em!
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Rin said,
LOL! Sex advice is the worst from your parents. After my first son was born and I started dating again, my mum would warn me just before I left the house for my date “no bang bang”!! Hahaha, she made me feel so dirty >_<
[Reply]
Ling Reply:
November 22nd, 2011 at 4:36 pm
@Rin, Your mum is so funny! “No bang bang!”
[Reply]
Ling Reply:
November 22nd, 2011 at 4:37 pm
@Rin, And you’re not dirty…just very sexual, you sexy lady!
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cynthia said,
oh boy, this is something I would never want to know from my mother of giving me sexual advice. My mom nags on me to keep myself not from getting sick and she always says that she wants to make me soup and all. She’s giving you motherly love =)
[Reply]
Ling Reply:
December 21st, 2011 at 10:17 pm
@cynthia, Mothers will be mothers!!! LOLOL
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Evalyn said,
I’m intrigued as to how she finished the sentence “You guys shouldn’t have sex when…” LOL!
[Reply]
Ling Reply:
December 21st, 2011 at 10:18 pm
@Evalyn, Well…she was saying that if or when I get pregnant, we should abstain from sexual activities…I nearly died!!! Lalalalalalalalaaaaaaa…I can’t hear you!!!! LOL
[Reply]
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